Dressed to Kill (the Indian Way)

I admit, there have been other occasions when I have needed longer than half and hour and the support of 2 other people to get dressed. This usually involved a big night out, the contents of at least two different closets and about 300 different combinations which all have to be tried on and then discarded (the girls out there know what I'm talking about).
But here was a novel situation: I knew exactly what I was going to wear and STILL needed all the above resources. Let me introduce you to the Saree, the traditional Indian formal dress item for women. It is widely spread and even in big cities there are many women who wear it instead of the Western option of Jeans and T-Shirt. So, you might think (as I naively did), it surely can't be so hard if everybody wears it? WRONG! The process involved in getting the 3 meters of cloth to stay on your body consists of folding and tucking and pinning and (of course), abundant cheek pinching by the Indian girl who has volunteered to do all this for you (to express her happiness at seeing you go through the torture she endures every morning). The wearer (me) is reduced to standing there like a mannequin with her hands in the air and being turned this way and that.
The result can be admired above. No fear, there is no danger of unintended slippage. (The one good thing is that the feet, perpetually dirty as mine tend to be, are thus obscured. Can lead to stumbling hazard though).